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My Husband Andy

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Nov 27, 2016

I don’t know how to go about this.  My heart is broken in so many ways. My husband, Andy, died this morning.

Most of you know at least part of the story because I’ve talked about him in my videos. Long story short, he died from complications of a lifetime of drinking and smoking.  He was 60 years old.

Andy has been part of my life, off and on, since I was 14. I can’t bring myself to even post a picture of him right now, but you can see a pic of him in this video where I read from my diary and talk about the way we met.  I recorded this several months ago.

If you want more details, you can also watch this video which I recorded just a few days ago.

I don’t know what happens from here. I really don’t. We have lived in separate states for 5½ years, and I have not even seen him in over 2 years. We talked often and actually got along much better apart, because I didn’t have to see him drink.  I assume his family will do what they want and that’s probably the best thing. Just don’t know.

I’m taking some time off from my blogs and videos. Will be back when I feel better.

Update 6/4/19 – I just read this post for the first time since I posted it.  I wanted to update that I handled all my husband’s death process and expenses.  It was important to me, very important, to have him cremated (his wishes) and have him sent to me. So he’s in my dresser drawer, safe and sound.

What I went through to get his body cremated and sent to me was a nightmare that lasted weeks.  His ex-wife, the mother of his kids (they had been divorced for many years) had his body moved to a relatives funeral home and they would not release the body to me. I called a random funeral home to ask for help and the man I dealt with was pure gold. He told me the legal steps I had to take to get the body released which meant filing a complaint about the funeral home and having an agency step in to force them to release him to me.  Once I got that straight, the funeral director that I called handled everything from there. He picked up Andy’s body, had him cremated and sent me the ashes. He was the nicest man ever and I could never thank him enough for getting me through all that.

I could have had that other funeral home shut down (or at least seriously fined) for taking my husband’s body without my permission and refusing to release it to me, knowing full well that I was his wife.  I could have also sued the hospital for releasing his body to his ex when they knew I was his wife.  But I didn’t do any of that. I was just glad to have the ashes.  But it was a very long process (almost a month) which included a ton of phone calls, lots of crying and insane worrying that I would never get him back. That’s additional stress I did not need at a time like that. But in the end, I brought him home. That felt very good.

 

 

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